Donnie Wahlberg on Trial

You take a flight with your husband, and he takes a picture of you, because he thinks you’re “oh, so cute”. Do we say “Awww” or do we yell, “Guilty!”?

Your honor, on Monday, Donnie Wahlberg (the husband) shared a photo of him and Jenny (the wife) on Instagram, saying, “Not sure if she’s paying homage to her favorite move – Airplane – or if I literally talked to her sleep!”

“Exhibit A”. Donnie Wahlberg on Instagram, Apr 8, 2019.

The comments regarding this picture began to flow and, among other replies, Donnie said, “I didn’t say she won’t take revenge. I just said she won’t be mad;” and to @just4lauryn – who wrote “Omg she is going to mule kick you for posting this” – he replied, “never. Best thing about her is her sense of humor.”

Now, your honor, members of the jury, Blockheads holding a child in one arm while watching the dog eating the child’s meal and reading this post from a mobile that’s going to end up in the puke released by the cat: A question remains. Is this, in fact, an act that could be perceived by the wife with a smile?

I’d like to present at this point “Exhibit B”, which shows a clip of the couple after the flight.

“Exhibit B”. Donnie Wahlberg on Instagram Stories, Apr 8, 2019

Your honor, members of the jury and Blockheads around the Block, we do see -in fact – the wife smiling and saying “That was funny;” however, was it indeed?

Well, I don’t know about you, but: if I wake up after a flight, without a hair out of place, with a Louis Vuitton hand bag next to me…, in a private jet…, WITH DONNIE WAHLBERG’S FACE ON MY FACE, I promise you that my smile alone will be worthy of a Mark Twain Prize (…which is for American Humor, and I only did open mics so far, and I was born and raised in Argentina. I’ll stop writing; now.)

I say, “not guilty,” your honor! And recommend myself for my big break, since I actually quit my Law practice to be a starving full-time writer/comedian.

I rest my case.

(And yes. Jenny has also a Louis Vuitton makeup bag on her lap. Shut up.)